The last day of normal

 I’m sure everyone has their own version of their very last normal day.

The very first time I heard about covid was sometime in January 2020. We were still healing from that awful bushfire in Australia, waiting for our days, sky, and breathing capability to become normal again. And my husband just casually said “there is a new virus outbreak in China. People die”

I told him, who cares. it would be just like SARS. I was living in Singapore when the SARS outbreak happened. I didn’t even remember it. It was over just like that.

Fast forward to February, case numbers start to creep up in the bigger cities like Sydney and Melbourne. My memory of the last big event/day out I went to that still felt normal was the Royal Canberra show on February 28th 2020. The last Canberra show before covid (it was cancelled in 2021). I’m so glad I went to take my son. It was such a beautiful day. It was such a beautiful normal day, without any fear of touching surfaces, without having to wear a mask or disinfect your hands every 5 minutes. 

Between then and the Canberra lockdown, which happened at the end of March, we started to feel anxious and guilty whenever we were out and about. We had no idea what was actually going on, and what would happen in the near future. 

I still remember going to Yarralumla playstation and petting zoo with my son during that period. We were the only ones there. We had the train all to ourselves, and we were the only ones roaming around the petting zoo. I was getting really anxious and worried. I was wondering whether animals could spread the virus. I was also feeling guilty to be one of those mums who was still going out with her child, instead of keeping ourselves locked up at home. But at the same time, Canberra did not have any case, yet. So why should we lock ourselves up? Plus, how dangerous was this virus? It seemed like not many young people died from it. So why bother?

In March, Canberra finally has its first cases. A lot of plans were cancelled. We had to distance ourselves from our family and friends. By the end of March 2020, our lives finally went into standstill. And that was the end of normal as we knew it, 

Lately, I have been feeling sad and nostalgic for the normal days. I actually haven’t felt this way in 2020, even when Canberra was in lockdown. Maybe in those early days, I was still full of hope. We managed to get back to normal pretty quickly. And ever since then, even when there was an outbreak in Melbourne or Sydney, I strongly believed that they would be able to control the situation. In the end they always did. But for some reason, this recent outbreak in Sydney, the delta variant, is making me lose hope. Here we go again, and this time I feel like the virus will be harder to shake. Plus we are all starting to feel the pandemic fatigue. We are all sick and tired of it. We just want our lives back. Our normal, pre covid, pre bushfire life.

I can see more people are beginning to ignore the situation, and just go on holidays whenever they can. And I don’t blame them. I want to do the same. I told my husband, the next time both Sydney and Melbourne are on the clear, I am flying to Melbourne. I don’t care, even if I have to bring my son with me. I need to see Melbourne. I miss Melbourne. And I don’t know when I would be able to go back again.